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The Void - Surviving the End of the Premenstrual Phase

I’m slowly emerging from my moon cave (week of my period), and honestly, estrogen needs to get a move on; I've got stuff to do this month!

Last cycle was about 4 days too long, and by the end of it, I was done!

I was chatting to some friends the other day, and I mentioned The Void, to which they replied...

“Oooooh what’s that?”

So that’s what I wanted to talk to you about this week...

What in the Heck Is The Void?

It's a term coined by The Red School (where all my training is informed).

And it’s basically the “WTF is even happening” limbo at the tail end of your premenstrual phase, just before you bleed.

Even if you know to the millisecond when your bleed is due, there’s still that window when you question everything.

“Are we sure?”
“Maybe I’m just going mad?”
“Did I really need to launch the remote across the sitting room like that?” (probably… true story)

The Void feels like The Nothing just swept across your life.

Side Quest - Yes, I am referencing The NeverEnding Story.

Yes, I crushed hard on Atreyu.

And yes, the trauma of his horse Artrax sinking into the swamp of sadness will haunt me forever (this and Watership Down, but that’s a blog for another day... damn you Bright Eyes 😭)

The Swamp of Sadness (aka Your Late Luteal Phase)

So, you did all your remote control throwing last week (I wish I could say it was longer ago than that 🤣), now you’re just bloated, numb, and soooo ready to bleed.

“What am I even doing?”
“Why am I like this?”
“Whhhaaaaat’s even the point of meeeeeee?” 😂

Allllllll the drama, all alone, sinking in your swamp of sadness.

👉 During the late luteal phase (second half of your cycle), the drop in estrogen and progesterone affects serotonin, which is partly why everything feels extra swampy and sad.

Except no one is trying to pull you out...

The “Oooohh is it that time of the month?” (Call it a period at least, FFS.)
The little eye roll.
The full step-back.

All very ouchy.

It’s lonely in The Void, and you feel unheard.

When You’re in Perimenopause...

In perimenopause (when your cycles start to get all kinds of wonky), The Void can feel like a lifetime.

Emotional dysregulation kicks in, and suddenly it’s like...
“Oh, is this just how I am now?”

But friend, if you’ve ever found yourself here, here’s what I want you to know...

First: Your Feelings Are Valid

When we don’t have the energy to mask or shove stuff down, things bubble up. The delivery might be a lot (understatement), but something in you is still trying to be voiced.

Can you get curious about that?

What part of you isn’t being heard?

What does that part need right now?

Is there a safer way for that part of you to speak, before it launches the telly remote across the room 🤣?

Here are 3 little journaling or reflection questions to help you in The Void...

1. ✍️ What part of me is trying to speak up, and what has it been trying to say for a while now?
2. ✍️ If I didn’t have to be “reasonable” right now, what would I let myself feel or ask for?
3. ✍️ What would it look like to stay with this feeling instead of fixing or fighting it?

And Secondly (Most Importantly)... It’s Temporary

This is not just your life now.

There’s nothing wrong with you.

You’re moving through a phase (even if it's a long one), and it will pass.

That’s the beauty of being cyclical; all phases are just that. Phases.

How you feel will change again.

So hold space for yourself to move through this with as much kindness (and curiosity) as you can.

Maybe give yourself space, solo time, or maybe just a proper cry.

It’ll all feel different next week.

I’m here, and I see you 🩷

P.S. DO NOT google “Where is Atreyu now” like I just did. It will shatter the illusion 🤣🤣🤣

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